From Carolina Watchman, January 25, 1845
There doesn’t seem to be any reason to think that the author of this source was insincere in his or her beliefs that mothers were responsible for the many things detailed in the article. It seems prudent to wonder, though, how many women were in a position to be able to dutifully attend to all of these details. Surely upper-class women who were expected to supervise the labors of others but not do much physical work themselves had the luxury of some free time with which to attend to their children’s needs. Less wealthy women, however, had far less time. Women who lived on subsistence farms (farms that provided only the family’s basic needs), or who needed to take in other people’s washing or do other work to help make ends meet would have had very little free time. Enslaved women, too, spent most of their time working, and the hard physical labor that they did all day must have sapped their energy. This is not to say, of course, that women with less available time and fewer economic resources were poor mothers — indeed, many mothers were deeply devoted to their children and provided them with love, moral instruction, discipline, devoted care, and religious faith despite extraordinarily trying circumstances. But the author of this article does not seem to have these women in mind when writing the article, and seems to assume that women would be able to devote their undivided attention to “the daily, hourly task of weeding her little garden” rather than weaving childcare into days that were filled with more literal agricultural labors and other tasks requiring their attention.
A mother is usually also a wife, and has the management of a family and a direct influence over subordination to her head, has the seat of authority and wields the sceptre of government. From a position of entire dependence, she has risen to power and rank, and though her throne may be in a cottage, and her dominion the little work of household affairs, yet is she not the less really responsible, than is that youthful queen who now sways a sceptre over the four quarters of the earth. But for what is she responsible?
She is responsible for the nursing and rearing of her progeny; for their physical constitution and growth; their exercise and proper sustenance in early life. A child left to grow up deformed, bloated, or meagre, is an object of maternal negligence.
She is responsible for a child's habits; including cleanliness, order, conversation, eating, sleeping, manners, and general propriety of behavior. A child deficient or untaught in these particulars, will prove a living monument of parental disregard; because generally speaking, a mother can, if she will, greatly control children in these matters.
She is responsible for their deportment. She can make them fearful and cringing, she can make them modest or impertinent, ingenious or deceitful; mean or manly; clownish or polite. The germ of all these things is in childhood, and a mother can repress or bring them forth.
She is responsible for the principles which her children entertain in early life. For her it is to say whether those who go forth, from her fireside, shall be imbued with sentiments of virtue, truth, honor, honesty, temperance, industry, benevolence, and morality, or those of a contrary character -- vice, fraud, drunkenness, idleness, covetousness. These last will be found to the most natural growth; but on her is devolved the daily, hourly task of weeding her little garden -- of eradicating these odious productions, and planting the human with the lily, the rose, and the amaranth, that fadeless flower, emblem of truth.
She is to a very considerable extent responsible for the temper and disposition of her children. Constitutionally they may be violent, irritable, or revengeful; but for regulation or correction of these passions a mother is responsible.
She is responsible for the intellectual acquirement of her children, that is, she is bound to do what she can for this object. Schools, academies, and colleges open their portals throughout our land; and every mother is under heavy responsibilities to see that her sons and daughters have all benefits which these afford and which circumstances permit them to enjoy.
She is responsible for their religious education. The beginning of all wisdom is the fear of God; and this every mother must teach. Reverence for God, acquaintance with His word, respect for the duties of ordinance of religion are within the ability of every parent to implant, and if children grow up ignorant or regardless of the Bible and the Saviour, what mother, when she considers the wickedness of the human heart, can expect them to rise up and call her blessed?
-- Mother's Journ